A Mother's Day Love Note



I don't post very often about what it's like to be a single mom on my Facebook wall for a few reasons. The first is because I have an amazing support group that I reach out to for understanding and camaraderie. The second is because being a single mom is the greatest gift of my life. Sure, it was hell to get here, but even the worst days now are better than the best days I ever had as a "we." Every single one of them. I say that because I didn't know "me" back then. I knew some things I enjoyed and I knew how to put on a happy face, but I didn't know how to be alone with me. I couldn't walk into a room alone without questioning if I belonged. I couldn't comfort myself. I couldn't do anything without seeking validation.
The thing was, even when I was married I rarely got that validation. Everything was fleeting or tied to a prerequisite. Mother's Day was usually the hardest because it was always a gigantic let down. That all changed a few years ago when I decided Mother's Day was for me. I wasn't going to rely on anyone else to bring about my happiness or to waste a day wishing I had done something else. I was simply going to do what I really wanted to do with the confident knowledge that the people who needed to be there would be.
So I woke up bright and early with my kids, put on my favorite dress, did my makeup and left the house to get donuts and berries. We sat in the grass under the sun shine with a cool breeze and it is one of my happiest memories.
I realized I could put the effort into me- doing what I wanted to do, looking the way I wanted to look, spending time outdoors with my kids- and I didn't need anyone to complete the picture.
As this Mother's Day approaches, I know it can be a really emotionally charged time. Maybe you're missing someone, missing out, or feeling let down. You're the reason I posted this. I want you to know you're not alone in having those feelings. But here's the thing- Mother's Day is about you Moms. So share your truth, gratitude, beauty, longing, or anything in your heart. We're all in this together. 

After I shared this, people came out of the woodwork to comment on my post. I thought it might resonate here, too. I just want to encourage you to be courageous- follow your path and share fearlessly. We don't always post on social media to change opinions, sometimes we just post to find zebras with the same stripes.

Sending love this Mother's Day weekend to all the amazing women in the world!

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